A Poem for Recovery

I have suffered from an eating disorder for the past nine years and choosing recovery over the last two years was what I thought to be the hardest thing I have ever done – though it turned out to be a whole lot easier than living with it. I have written a small poem to show others that recovery is possible, it can takes year and I am still in recovery. Everyone’s recovery is different and there is no such thing as perfect but, then again, perfection does not exist and personally I have discovered is not worth the sacrifice. I hope this short poem inspires more people to choose recovery or at least help inspire you or a loved one to consider recovery. Accepting help is not weakness. Over the past few years (and despite my young age,) I have lost so many friends to their eating disorder. First Steps ED saved my life and I am here not only fighting for my life but in memory of theirs too. My motivation for recovery is to inspire and help others, everyone’s is different but as poignant and important. Today I am a medical student and hope, as a future doctor, to help others and show that it is never too late to chose recovery. Let’s change the 1 in 5!!

Alone, in the dark she sits perched unaware on the edge of a vast crevasse with no end.

A hand reaches out, grasping hers; gently but firmly, with good intent. “It’s OK”, a voice whispers in the breeze. She barely notices, but the hand remains non-judgmental and does pull her up, rather wait for her to decide to make a move.

Suddenly, she sees the hole, but her mind feels so empty and alone. The hole looks so tempting to hide in and escape, from her fear, for which she does not know what of.

She is then reminded of the hand, which still is intertwined with hers. “It’s OK not to be ready, but I can show the way” Her mind flickers and memories flood back in good and bad. “What if bad things happen? What happens if it hurts?” She asks. “It will hurt at times and especially at first, but I will be there for you. I promise you that the pain is temporary, but the reward will be worth it”.

“It sounds too hard though and I’m so close to the edge”.

“You are here today, despite all the bad memories and the bad things that have happened to you. Trust me, you have done that and that is harder”.

“If I change my mind and it gets too hard, can I come back?”

“If you want to, I am still here for you and always will be”

“OK”, she shuffles away from the edge nervously. She then with the help of the hand pulls herself up.

“No journey is perfect, but in the end, it will make you a stronger person. You can show others that it is possible”.

She then looks again at the hand and realises the hand was in fact her own hand. However, she looked older, and her kind nature shone ear to ear.

“You are here today for a reason, though it is hard to see right now, and it will get better. You may not trust me, but I am always here waiting”.

In memory of those I have lost. Let’s beat the 1 in 5!! xx